The Shakti Shine - February 17th, 2020
Shakti Love Notes
We are always growing. I love that! And the more I grow, the more I recognize how important it is for us all to share what we're going through-- even (and especially) me.
So these Love Notes are a space for me to share with you each week-- about the studio, my life, how our community is growing.
Last week I did something I've never done before.
I cancelled a private client because I didn't feel well, but I wasn't physically ill. It was one hour before, and I just felt off.
I'd felt off for a few days already, and I credit it partly to the roller coaster Georgia February climate, partly to my yearly Februblues. and partly to ovulation. By Monday at noon I felt a familiar feeling in my chest. Closed, constricted, tight. And a similar feeling in my bones. It sounded like this: Shut down, close off, run. I could feel a wall between myself and the people around me.
Typical Ruby would have pushed through the rest of the day and pretended like everything was fine, because feeling a little off isn't a good enough excuse to cancel any part of the schedule for the day.
But something nudged me to reroute the typical path.
So I cancelled. I picked up lunch and headed straight home. With a little space I felt more grounded and like I could gain some perspective so I texted my friends (another something I don't typically do in these scenarios):
"Y'all I've just been feeling so much resistance in random moments the last 5 days and realize that might've come through today and I'm sorry if it did.... Feeling easily mentally thrown off and not able to think as clearly as normal."
(insert kind responses about giving me space, loving me, and supporting me)
"...Thank you. I just know that I can come across as super closed off when I feel this way and wanted to open up and acknowledge it..."
To which I received: I'm so glad you opened up! If feels good to hear you be honest about how you feel.
And then I cried for 2 hours. Which was exactly what I needed. And exactly what I would have normally avoided.
I cried and complained and bitched about injustice and wallowed in a little self-pity and wallowed in remorse about feeling any self-pity at all, and I felt a little hopeless for a few hours.
And then I felt clear.
Not clear like 'now I know all the answers.' Not even clear like 'now I feel totally back to normal.'
Clear like 'wow, I really needed that. Now I feel ready to move forward.'
I spent the rest of the week considering and teaching about how to 'be where you are' and our relationship to resistance.
Baron says, "If you want to get anywhere genuinely new, it will require that you be totally present where you are first."
I get that. So what's all of the resistance about? Why is it so easy to resist and run away? Why is it so hard to be honest about where I am when something comes up? Why do I resist what I know deep down to be best? And why does resistance feel so hard to beat?
But the more I sat with it, taught on it, and thought about it, the more I could see.
Here's where I landed:
Resistance isn't something I want to get rid of; it has so much to offer. I believe it teaches us to see what we're avoiding, and it invites us to ask 'Why?' It challenges us to break up the norm and choose a new path. When I think about resistance, I think about strength training. I think about gaining muscle, and in this case, flexing the muscle of acceptance. Over time resistance makes us resilient, which is an admirable trait to carry with you out into the world-- to be able to hold true to what is without collapsing under the pressure, to be able to bounce back when life gets tough. Resistance invites us to lean in, even though it feels like we want to run away, and when we lean in we realize that what's available where we are is worth being right here, right now. And that is a breakthrough. Resistance makes breakthroughs possible. The feeling of 'getting it' in the moment- total acceptance of what is and seeing clearly for the first time- wouldn't be possible without resistance.
So when I recall my typical resistance to accepting where I am when I'm feeling off, and I compare that to my experience when I broke through into honest presence, I can see how I now have access to getting someplace genuinely new.
That new place looks like: candor, transparency, vulnerability, receiving support, space, enoughness, creating room for duality, grace, softening, release.
It's like Baron says in Perfectly Imperfect:
"Whatever comes up (in a pose), and whatever comes along, is merely something for you to be with and experience. It is so simple and straightforward: let your resistance be, and it will let you be. This approach expands your being and allows for the extraordinary to enter. The creative flow in the practice will expand because you expand.
Resistance dissolves in the face of full acceptance, and you are transported into a whole new world.โ
xx
Ruby
Beyond the mat...
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And we love you.
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UPCOMING//
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Teacher Trainee Spotlight!
Maddie Kinnett
What has been the highlight of teacher training so far? Meeting new people that love yoga just as much as I do. Sharing with them & finding that I relate so much to them as well. Learning new things!
What has been the biggest challenge? Being away from home on training weekends for over 10 hours, accepting feedback, and trying not to be too hard on myself.
What are you waking up to in your life? My inner true self that has been there all along, becoming more confident, fearless, and patient with myself & others around me.
~ Inquiry Corner ~
Baptiste Methodology- This is why we do what we do. It's the foundation of the style of yoga we offer and sets the stage for our Up to Something Bigger attitude. Everything from how to show up, practices & techniques, and the structures to support.
5 pillars of a vinyasa yoga practice.
In this week's IGTV, Emily breaks down the physical pillars of a power yoga class:
Drishti, Ujjayi, Bandhas, Tapas, and Vinyasa.
Learn more about what these words mean and how they translate off the mat.
Check it out!
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